Well I just got back from church and the Senior Pastor from another church preached from John 8…boy did he preach! I guess God really wants this passage to be emphasized since this is the second time I’ve heard this message. Basically the message was: “While you are focused on your future, people are busy looking at your past.” He said if we didn’t go through the things we have been through then we wouldn’t be where we are today and God allows these things because they are neccessary.

That’s all I have to say everyone. My Past is my Past. While you are focused on trying to condemn me for my past I’m busy moving foward to my bright and promising future, This is my season!

If you want to read about the first time I received this message go to the John 8 titled entry.

Today was a very peaceful day today and boy did the state bishop preach! I enjoyed Sunday service today and I’m looking forward to returning to church later today at 5pm for service again. I can’t get enough of the Word. It’s the only thing that keeps me well nourished and spiritually strong to be able to withstand the wiles of the devil. I would put what the sermon was about, but I think I’ll just keep that to myself for now. The last time I put the sermon on my blog it made no difference. I actually put that sermon on my blog to help Jeremy whom continues to try to humiliate me for my mistakes without looking at his own faults. I hoped that it would make a difference, but instead it did nothing because he ignores the entries that are positive and helpful and focuses on the ones when I’m expressing my feelings and talking about something negative that happened that particular day.

It’s such a shame when a person does everything to expose you and when you expose them they get so bent out of shape from being put to shame they can’t function unless their doing something to further hurt you even more. How can you dish stuff out, but when it comes back to you, you can’t handle it?

That reminds me of a chapter in a book I’m reading called “The 10 Secrets to Inner Peace and Success”. It explains in secret 3 that we cannot give what we don’t have. Meaning you cannot give love if you don’t have love inside you. If you have nothing, but hatred, anger, and bitterness inside then that’s all you can give away. When you do that energy that you’ve dished out will eventually return to you. If you give away love then love will return to you. Light overcomes darkness and love overcomes hate. Your love will cancel out other’s negativity. This is one of the functions of the universe. If you are a positive person you will attract positive people and vice versa.

Well I’m about to grab something to eat and prepare to return church. If God put’s it on my heart to add tonights sermon then I will. As far as this morning, in my heart I don’t feel He wants me to share the sermon because it’s for me and anyone else that was present in service today that received the Word.

Despite the unforunate events that took place this morning I’ve managed to have a pretty good day and I plan on having an even better day tommorow. Everything is all taken care of when it comes to my enemies and destroyers so I have nothing at all to worry about and there’s no need at all to get stressed, which I am not so who cares. My life will continue to improve and get better. I will continue to be blessed and move to Florida with no worries in the world because now life is so much better and as soon as October 1st comes that will be my very first day of pure and total peace.

Today I took my sons to the movies to see The Last Mimzy and I gotta say this was the best movie I have seen ever. The storyline was simply beautiful and this movie was just so pleasing to the soul. This was the kind of thing I needed to see after this morning and it was simply magnificient.

Movie Grade: A+

Pros: Very well put together movie for the whole family. A masterpiece.

Cons: None.

After attending this wonderful movie I went to the mall with the kids and bought them some lunch. I also purchased a pair of red shoes that were on clearance to wear with a dress I’m wearing tommorow. You see the church I attend is a very important church in this city because my pastor whom I’ve known since age 11 is the pastor over all the pastors in the city his church resides in. Tommorow the head church of the state is coming to fellowship with our church so I have to dress up a bit. I usually wear a nice top and jeans or whatever I’m comfortable in (nothing trashy though) when I go, but this Sunday I won’t be stubborn and I’ll dress up a little.

Honestly just to let this be known if I really wanted Anthony’s church to be destroyed all I will have to do is tell my pastor and he will then conduct a meeting with the churches in my city to shut his corrupted church down. I mean who will they listen to??? The head pastor of a 30 year-old church that’s over them or a sorry 25 year-old pastor over a small storefront church that has only been open less than a year with only 15 members or less. You tell me. So why haven’t I you ask? Because the Lord says “Vengeance is mine” enough said.

I hope you are reading this Anthony which I believe you are since you simply have no life despite my efforts to block you from my site. You just can’t get enough. So keep coming to my site, reading my entries and trying to create confusion you false man of God. In time the Lord will deal with you and it’s a hefty price to pay to continue to attack a true child of God. You may continue to call Jeremy “anonymously” and alert him of my blog entries to create problems and he will continue to feed into your satanic, evil schemes. Your time is coming and there’s nothing you or Jeremy can do or say to destroy me or take away my joy. Just like the Psalm of David: He prepares a table for me before my enemies and He is my sheperd…

I have nothing to be afraid of.

Well it’s come down to it. I only have me to depend on to get to Florida. Jeremy kicked me and the kids to last on his list to be helped and blamed me for kicking him out. If you’ve been reading you’d know why he was actually kicked out.

Oh well…I’ll just sue him for my car door that he damaged which when I got an estimate it was roughly $2200 rounded off. That will help us move and I’ll save my $3000. That’s all I will be able to save hopefully while paying the rent, buying food and paying utilities with no help from him. At least in September I’ll be getting child support from him so the rent for the kids and I will be paid in Florida. When I get there I’ll be applying for child support for the new baby too which he claims isn’t his now. It’s funny how cowardly men are and the excuses they come up with not to help. Such unnecessary drama. Who did I get pregnant by?? The invisible man. Come on now he has to be really kidding me.

I gotta call the courts today to see how much it costs to file the claim. Anyways this is a done deal case, he was found guilty of kicking my car and jailed for it. There’s no way he can get out of it. I was trying to be reasonable by letting him pay for it on his own time, but when I mentioned getting help from him I got called names, and basically got told that you made your bed now sleep in it. I guess he thinks I’m suppose to care for the kids without help from him while he enjoys himself. He even called me Satan for asking him for help and telling him I was sueing him for my car that he damaged! Okay what’s so satanic about asking for help with his child and asking him to fixed a door he is responsible for damaging??? You tell me. Then he threatens to bring Anthony (whom has nothing to do with it) Eric (whom has nothing to do with it) and his brother (whom has nothing to do with it). Why bring them?? To try to humiliate me as a woman with lies? Who’s really satanic? He can bring them I don’t care the judge will ask did he damage my car and look at the conviction and rule in my favor and that will be that.

Well, I will continue to pray, be a righteous person and got to work. I’ll continue to take care of the kids and save so I can get myself and my children out of here and away from that psycho for good.

Anyways, it’s funny when you find people whom have copied your actually graphics and actually use them. I still don’t know how she got my actual background when I used a external stylesheet for the strawberry web builder. That puzzles me… I found out because I was looking at my sub domain stats and saw her site on it. I went to it and found she used my old background for the strawberry web-builder and uploaded it to photobucket to use. She then altered th colors a bit, but it’s still my original work. Her site is here:

http://hp.knuddels.de/homepages/knuddels.de/hp/59/fangirl93.html

Using my actual original background graphic that I actually drew myself. She could’ve at least gave me credit for it.

I haven’t written in my blog in a while. I’ve been so busy with work and everything. Trust me, when you’re on a computer all day computer’s are the last thing that you want to be sitting at at the end of your day.

So I’ve gotten my 10 key up to about 120kpm (key’s per minute) and my typing is at 18wpm. That’s almost half of my goal which is 40wpm and the 10 key is 140. Okay on to the next subject…

My mom and I went shopping today for shoes and we also bought some BE makeup. I’ve been trying to get her to go to Bare Escentuals with me for ages. I’m going to buy her some makeup from there for Mother’s Day. Maybe the color she liked that she didn’t get called “sapphire” and some foundation or I might just get her a makeup kit like the new “Pure Moxie Collection”. I think I’ll get the foundation though so she can try it out. I’ll get her the foundation kit or I’ll get her a foundation, complexion booster, a foundation brush, mineral veil and the eyeshadow. I’ll have to wait and see. Maybe next month I’ll schedule her a makeover so I can know what colors to buy.

Well I gotta go…it’s late and I need to get some shuteye.

Goodnight.

So today after my doctor’s appointment out of boredom I redesigned Vanilla Sugar Templates for the third time I think…

Or is this the fourth time?

….

I validated it to see if there were any errors and guess what?? No errors again. Good huh?

Babys doing fine so now I have to get another ultrasound. Well at least I’ll have another pic of baby to post before she’s (I’m hoping) is born. No more bleeding, no more stress.

It seems to be finally warming up a bit, well we will see anyway. The forecast claims weather in the 50′s and rising each day. I can’t wait till I get to Florida and the low temp’s are ehem’ 70 degrees. That will be so lovely.

Hopefully I have peace now and no idiots from Called 2 “Corrupted” Conquer is coming to my site reading about my life anymore. Next month I’ll  recheck the IP’s to make sure.

We’ll I gotta go clean up the house and get the mail. It isn’t much to talk about today ’cause it has been pretty boring. Woke up went to doctor or should I say midwife, made some appointments, went home. Oh yeah I gotta call Dr. Weinstein and make another appointment!

Gotta go bye!

Today was a pretty good day since I didn’t have to be at work till 12pm. Tommorow I have to take off because I have a Dr. Appointment so I’m going to enjoy my day tommorow…I’ll probably clean up the house again.

Anyways I’m currently working on a new layout to replace the old one I started the blog with because I really hate that layout now. So I won’t be writing much today. Oh just to let you know I validated this new layout and guess what?? No errors! Yay!

Well here’s a survey I took yesterday while I was bored:

Well for starters today went okay…

I was able to cope a little better at work, but I still struggled at the computer to stay awake in the morning because I had to get up at 7am, get the kids dressed and fed, myself dressed and fed and out the door my 8am so I can get to work by 9am.

Later I finished redesigning the Tropical Paradise layout that I first created for the summer. Not the Florida one with the lovely beach scene, but the bright colorful one. I starred at it for weeks hating it more and more, but I couldn’t think of what to do with it. So yesterday I thought of a wonderful idea! Recently I’ve noticed that a lot of fashions from the 80′s have been coming back…tunic tops, bright plastic jewelry, long beaded necklaces, bright head bands, baby-doll tops, 80′s prints etc. Man I love it at the mall because those styles are not only cute and fun, but they are maternity friendly. When I go shopping I grab whatever I can get.

With that said I decided to create a theme that had that “groovy” 80′s look: Bright colors, stripes, flowers, etc. I just gave it the last finishing touches today and I have to say I’m impressed and happy with my new summer theme. So when I was done I was bored and decided to use Firefox to validate the HTML for my site and each site was claimed to have “40″ errors or less. Stupid errors like saying I didn’t close a tag when I know I did, saying I can’t use the <u> tag etc. Who really wants to create a selector for every <b> <u> and <i> tag? A lot of the errors were about defining an “id” 2 times. I was a bit stumped so I decided to go on some websites and validate their HTML and what do you know? About 99% of all the websites including Yahoo.com and Google.com had errors. Some even more than me like Google as simple as that site looks had a total of 86 errors on there’s. WOW! These site’s are quite popular and they have all these so-called errors.

To sum this all up: It doesn’t really matter about the validation as long as all your images are using the alt tag, your page is displaying properly in IE and FF (which are the top two browsers meaning all other browsers will display your site much the same), there are no broken links or images, your site is easy to navigate, has a well-formed layout (Which honestly Yahoo and Google both lack severely), and the content is good. Visitors don’t care how many errors you have from the site validation they care about the content of your site and how easy it is to navigate it.

Other than that I looked up some of the most recent IP’s that have visited my site and blocked every IP from my city other than the IP from my job and my own IP so Anthony and his dumb congregation can stop reading about my life. Get a life losers!

I will like to start off by saying how I wish I could grasp that something we call “Total Peace”. I have my blog to write about my day, my feelings, to vent or share information and I can’t even enjoy this little bit without problems. I found out that Anthony and his church members are still accessing my site and reading about my life even with my attempts to block them from access from Jeremy’s voicemails. I did some IP lookups today and found a couple of users are using internet services that are located in the city I live in. What do I have to do? Block all the IP’s from my city other than my own from accessing my site? I guess so.

To Anthony and your so-called congregation:

You need to spend more time on learning to be more Christlike and studying the Word and less time on my site. My site has nothing to do with your spiritual growth in Christ. Get a life, stop reading about mine and apply that energy to your own lives.

Today’s sermon really touched me because I felt like it was directed to me in so many ways. The guest pastor today preached from the book of John chapter 8 about the adultress woman whom was caught in the act. What he pointed out was how the men were humiliating this woman because of her sin to set up Jesus and Jesus ignored them because of there ignorance. He finally spoke and said the one without sin, cast the first stone. None of the men were without sin and threw down there stones and departed. When the woman was alone Jesus spoke a sentence that gave both forgiveness and restoration: “Go and sin no more”.

You see in the bible God says that we are only to be condemned before him a Holy God and no one else. He is the only one whom has the right and authority to condemn us. No man or woman has that right because their flesh are just as sinful as our own and everyone has sinned. Satan uses public humiliation to destroy a person. By exposing people’s hidden sins and doing what he can to destroy your image and your soul. When you feel convicted for doing something wrong you stand at a cross road with 2 options: Condemnation and Salvation. It’s up to you to choose which way to go. When you choose Condemnation you allow Satan to destroy you with guilt and humiliation, but when you choose Salvation you repent and ask for mercy and forgiveness and then you are restored.

The pastor also touched basis strongly on forgiveness and how people have unforgiving hearts. Doing things to get revenge like humiliating the person whom wronged them for example. He explained that if we are to be forgiven we must forgive others because if we do not then God will treat us with the same mercy as we have shown to our brothers and sisters. This really touched me because it has been very hard for me to forgive Jeremy for almost killing me and then cheating multiple times afterwards. I knew I needed to hear that. I know I’m suppose to forgive to be forgiven, but it’s so hard when the person makes it difficult and brings accusers, just like they did to the woman in John 8 and accuse and condemn you.

I’ve also had him doing everything in his power to destroy my image by telling everything that I have done while leaving his own sins uncovered like the men in John 8; Sometime’s he’s even exagerrated the truth to humiliate me just like Satan intends. We are to cast our cares upon God only and even I am guilty of this by telling my friends and family about the pain I’ve endured from him. I’ve never left out my own sins, but I still shouldn’t tell them about my problems.

Even though I must work on forgiving him which has been alot easier to do since he hasn’t been in my life I still will not speak with him. He continues to threaten to do things to destroy me, accuses me of cheating and then goes to saying how he loves me. He then says he doesn’t care about me, but just Destin. Which I know is true and he never cared for me anyways so I’m not surprised or upset about that fact. I’m just observing and I’ve seen a change in his attitude from being hostile to calm to hostile again. He disappeared for 3 days leaving me here bleeding, stressed and with my 2 sons whom were very difficult to handle while on bedrest. That was very stressful for me and when I decide not to speak with him he’s going insane. That is how I felt and it was worse for me because of all the added stress besides him being MIA.

I just want to take care of my kids, move to Florida, finish school as a tecaher, grow in Christ, be truly happy and never see him again.

Note: Please read the entire entry from top to bottom before adding a comment. New information has been added due to recent findings.

The reason I’m writing this post is to warn my fellow viewers and anyone else about a notorious company called Talent 6. (Hopefully this post will show up in an internet search for Talent 6) I signed up with this company because it claimed I would be paid $250 a day to be a movie extra. I said to myself well hell a pregnant woman could do this. When I called they claimed I had to pay a $39 registration fee that was refundable during a 10 day trial period. I told the lady I would think about it because that was a pretty high price, but the lady insisted on me trying them out. So the next day I went to the site she told me about and found that there were hardly any listings in my area for things I could do. Many of the listings that were so-calledly in my area required me to travel to a different state. How could I get this job if there are so many others applying? I would be wasting $39 plus the $19.99 monthly fee for this useless crap. I tried calling them back to cancel, but they were closed so I called the next day and canceled the whole thing meaning getting my $39 back after arguing with the dumb foreign guy who kept trying to convince me not to cancel. I received a cancellation number and expected my money back in my account within the a 3 day refund period.

Of coarse that never happened…I also went shopping about 4 days later and returned a lot of stuff including a dress and a shirt to DEBS, sneakers to Foot Locker, a shirt to Rainbows and a necklace and earrings to Afterthoughts. I received my refunds from all 4 of these places in about 4 days total, but from Talent 6…no refund. The actual day I asked for the refund was March 27, 2007. So I inquired about the refund with my bank and they advised me to cancel my card out. A few days later my refund still hadn’t appeared so I inquired again and they said I should receive it in a total of 4 days from the cancellation period. I told them that I asked for the refund on March 27 and it was now April 4th. When they wrote me back they asked me to call Talent 6 again and see what’s going on and gave me a number. So I called Talent 6 and gave them my name and cancellation number and they claimed my refund had already been processed and I should receive it in about 4 days(The foreign guy again). It is now April 11th and guess what? No refund. They haven’t gave me anything back. Now I have to file a dispute form with my bank and sign an affidavit for Talent 6 to be investigated and the return of my $39.

Please people please! DO NOT fall for Talent 6′s great offers of making $250 a day…it’s a complete rip off and their keep your money! Their just some kind of scam business/website that robs inspiring models and actors of their money and dreams. If they were so legitimate I wouldn’t be going through this whole ordeal for a refund.

You call and speak with a professional obviously well speaking American and then when you call for a refund you’re talking to some foreign person whom can barely speak English. It’s all a big scam just to steal innocent models/actors money. DON”T DO IT.

Talent 6 should be called Rip-off 6!