So I’ve not kept my oath because I’ve been so busy at work and completely worn out. The last couple of days sucked so bad because I was so tired at work I was struggling not to fall asleep. I kept getting up walking around and eating snacks trying to retain energy because I was so tired.

Last night was a bad night because Jeremy had the fan on so I was cold and I had to keep pulling the comforter back on me because he kept pulling it off of me and Jeremiah. I then had a crook in my neck and had a nightmare about pit bulls and some man trying to kill me. I was afraid to leave my apartment. I eventually left my apartment and the 2 of the 3 pit bulls attacked me. I ended up climbing up a ledge to get away from the dogs, then kicking the 2 dogs that chased me up the ledge in their face launching them towards the ground to meet their doom. I guess I’m still disturbed from the recent pit bull attack I witnessed.

After work I came home and spoke to my Mom whom told me my grandfather passed away this morning. That really sucks man…

Not only is this devastating, but now I have to go on bereavement to a funeral and pay for expensive plane tickets that I can’t afford. I don’t really think the reality of my grandfather has hit me yet, but maybe it’s because we weren’t as close as most granddaughters are to their grandfathers. I don’t really know yet…only time will tell.

Maybe when this shock sets in…

I hope he went to paradise. I never will wish hell on anyone, but I can only hope. The ultimate decision of where he went is on how he lived his life and his status with God before he left this Earth…it’s too late to pray for him now. I can only hope…

*Sigh*