Man this week went by so fast. It seems like I didn’t get any rest either. I’m either doing for the kids or getting nagged by Jeremy for every little thing. When I start getting paid I’m going to go to the spa at least once a month to get a facial and my hair done ALONE! I’m really in need of some “me” time.

I’m either at work all day, or driving in rush hour traffic, or fixing breakfast or dinner, yelling at the boys, caring for Jeremiah or listening to complain. Yesterday I couldn’t even wash my hair in peace.

Why is it when you do things for people they never recognize it? I busted my ass to move here and get a good job. I bought what I could buy for the house. I’ve been struggling to make sure my sons have health insurance. I buy food and cook dinner. I fix breakfast in the morning and I try to make sure that even after all that I still look my best for Jeremy (Given the fact that I just had a baby 3 months ago]. I’m not given the least bit of credit, but I’m constantly told what I don’t do and what I did in the past.

[private]Sometimes I do think about what it would be like if I did leave this relationship and date. How it would be like to not have to hear about my past every time an argue arises or just because you’re bored. How it would feel to be appreciated and treated like a women without 90% of the physical contact being you touching my vagina or complaining about me not having sex when I’m tired just to bring up the past again when it has nothing to do with the fact that I’m tired. I have 3 sons, 5 years-old, a 1 year-old and a 3 months. I’m working a full time job, I have to come home and clean the house, mop the nasty ass bathroom, and rewash the half washed dishes in the sink so we can eat off of something sanitary. I cook, I clean and I pay bills, but I get no respect or credit. Not even a fuckin’ wedding ring. All I get is told how much I don’t do or how much I’m so-calledly cheating with my boss or some other unknown person. I can’t even go to the park without being accused of every little thing.[/private]

I had to vent because life at home has not been all that lately. Especially since I started this new job. Well I have to be up at 5am tomorrow because has yet again another “working interview” and the boys have to dropped off at daycare. Traffic is bad anyways in Florida, but the daycare is located off of a street where they are doing construction so it’s only a 1 lane street meaning bumper to bumper there and back during rush hour. Tomorrow is not going to be an easy day for me.