Eternally-Me.COM » Love

Do I have the right to be angry?

samara — Fri, 20 May 2011 08:23:42 +0000

After watching this please tell me if you think I am overreacting or if you feel that I have every right to feel the way I do. I totally feel disrespected…

BTW, this all happened within the matter of 1 week!

Free & Single

samara — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 19:40:08 +0000

I know I am so guilty of not writing in my digital journal for quite some time, but I’ve been busy doing other things like working, celebrating, making videos, or making hair products LOL. I made the shampoo for my product line last week(Ambrosia Lavish Curl Quenching Shampoo), and my mother took over the bottle just like she took over the hair milk, so I have to make replacements…SMH. It doesn’t matter though, the more I make them the better they become so I don’t mind. At least I know my products are good. :up:

In other news… My entry title: I’m DIVORCED people!! LOL! I got my divorce finalized on Wednesday and got child support, half the rental payments for the remainder of the lease, and he is also ordered to return my laptop. I know I will have to go back down to hold him in contempt when my laptop isn’t returned, but who cares! I’m FREE! We celebrated by going out to the nightclub and eating the top tier of the wedding cake. I’m so happy, smiling inside and out, and feeling so GOOD.

Other good news…

I got a raise at work yesterday, so that was a definant plus.

I’m talking to someone new. We had a nice lunch/dinner date last weekend and it was nice. I’ve been out with him before this, but it was more of a friendly outing because my sister and her friend came along. I didn’t even look at him that way back then. I was just having a good time, but I’m glad I met him. He seems like a really nice guy so far and I find him extremly attractive so I guess I’ll see how this goes. Sometimes I wonder where I get the will power to even put myself out there like this. I’m scared, but willing at the same time.

Stupid Me

samara — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 17:44:23 +0000

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I’m Getting Married!!

samara — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 01:25:06 +0000

Yes, you read right. I’m finally getting married to the man of my dreams, Brian (Laureate Earl Chancey) Crayton. We will be getting married this year on November 20th. We were planning on waiting until next year, but Brian just didn’t want to wait any longer and he can’t stand the thought of going into the new year without being married. So here we are 4 months and 20 days away from the big “I do”. So much work to do, planning, and money to be saved. BTW: We’ve launched our own wedding website at SweetVanillaSugar.COM.

We aren’t having a big wedding, but it still costs. I don’t want to be married in a church, and neither does he so we are going to rent a hall. If we would’ve waited until next year we would’ve gotten married outside, but it doesn’t matter. I love him so much and I’m glad that my dreams are finally coming true for once.

We’re also looking to move. Hopefully next month. I don’t think I can bare another month living in this ragged attack. We have mice, we live with a ghetto prostitute, and 2 old farts that have no respect for anyone in this house! I brought my cat Saphire here and the other night I could’ve sworn I saw a mouse on the bed. I was having a hard time settling down and then something told me to look over. When I did I saw a dark shape that was the equivalent size of a small rodent coming towards me. I quickly grabbed Jeremiah off the bed and jumped on the couch. Waking Brian up and turning the light on the rodent seemed to have vanished. I haven’t slept good since. I really think this place is making me lose my mind.

In other news I completed my first session of classes with an A. I’m really proud of myself and I hope I can keep at it on the same path good grades.

I’m also considering quitting my job soon. Brian wants me to, and I do and I don’t at the same time, but after finding out that despite how much a work and my previous experience, that I’m getting paid less than everyone else, I just might do that. I mean I have experience working with the MRDD population. Willing Hands work me like a Hebrew slave (6 days a week at times). When the owner and supervisor went on vacation a girl called off, and then the new girl they hired never came. I covered all the shifts to the point of even being the only worker in the house for a whole month. What’s the thanks that I get? To be paid $8/hour, while my best friend with no experience gets hired at $8.25 and another girl is hired at $8.75. WTF?!

A Little Bit of Peace

samara — Mon, 04 May 2009 02:29:04 +0000

I know I haven’t updated in a while because I’ve been so busy. It seems like all I do is work and that’s going to have to come to a stop. I work 5 or 6 days a week, but I only get up to 28 hours per week. Now does that make any sense to you?! I also had an interview and I’ve already taken the drug tests and background tests for the position. I will be only working 3 days a week and I will get 36 hours per week qualifying me as full-time. The shifts are 12 hour shifts, but 6 of those hours are paid sleep time. As soon as I am told when orientation starts I will be notifying my current job that I may need to resign. I wanted to keep this job, but it really doesn’t make any sense to do so. It takes up all my time during the week and I have hardly anytime to be with my boys let alone complete any of my school assignments which will begin May 15th. My education comes first and I know this job isn’t going to take me anywhere. All it does is pay my phone bill, and give me money to get around and have a little fun. I can’t do anything big like move into an apartment, or get a car. I gave this a great deal of thought and I’ve decided that my current job is really too much of a strain for me.

The newest thing in my life is Brian and I finally got our own little spot. It’s not much, but it’s a temporary start. We are currently renting a room in a shared house until we both have the finacial assets to move into an actual apartment although we’ve been also talking about getting a house and maybe renting out half of it. With the Down Payment Assistance program and his military benefits we can have the boys and ourselves in a house. I can’t wait until something moves in our favor so we can start making some steps forward, but this is a start. We can both sleep peacefully, and I can use my computer without people trying to control what I do with it. I don’t have to listen to anyone bitching and complaining and neither does Brian. We finally have a little peace in our lives.

I am really nervous, but I have faith in Brian. I love him so dearly and I believe we can make this work as long as we work together. Brian is so different from what I’m used to. He’s so loving and caring and helpful. He doesn’t disrespect me he is completely perfect in my eyes. I can’t see anything wrong with him. He is completely perfect from every angle in my eyes and I thank God for giving me another chance with him.