All this is doing is prolonging everything and all I wanted was to be free of him from my life. Now I have to wait until my child is born, get paternity testing and then I have to go back to court on October 6th. This sucks! I shouldn’t have to be married to him for 2 more months. I really want this to be over. I hate him and I am not only embaressed by being married to him, but I regret the decision of marrying him more than any bad choice I’ve ever made in my entire life. The baliff told him he’d have to pay for the test and he claimed he would. We’ll see if he’ll actually pay for it. It’s such a waste of time and money if you ask me, but if he wants to be a dumb ass then he can go ahead to do it. I don’t know who he is listening to, but he is only going to make it worse for himself, because I have nothing to hide. It’s so funny because I already know the results of the test, and I’m sure he does too, unless he is really severly mentally ill. Whatever the case maybe I will still have my divorce and since Brian wants to be a dumb ass he will be paying a whole lot of child support because I will make sure the judge knows every detail of his financial situation.

Word to the Wise: DO NOT get married without doing a thorough background check and live with the person for a year or 2 before making your final decision. It is not worth the stress to marry someone that you will eventually find that they are not what they seem and are the worst decision you’ve ever made.

I then asked him for his address and he refused to give it to me claiming to send the divorce papers to the house where he lives (referring to MY home). He has not been here for a whole month and he doesn’t pay any bills here so how can he claim he lives here? I did, however discover his actual address a few days later when I filed for a divorce. So the joke is on him.

Well today while downtown I found out that they sent a certified letter to his residence on the 21st of May. They still haven’t received anything back from him or the post office. I just don’t understand why he is so difficult. He has made it so clear that he does not want to be married or even cares about the child I am carrying so why not cooperate? He always has to make everything difficult. I do not want to married to that man any longer. I want to be free of him. I hate the fact that I ever married him in the first place! If he doesn’t accept the certified letter, I will then have to wait for it to come back, go back downtown and ask the courts to serve him by regular mail. I will then be able to proceed with the divorce. With or without him there. All in all, no matter how difficult he tries to be I will not be forced to stay married to him and I will get my divorce granted well before the end of this year!

Other than that, I start working my new job on Monday…YAY! I will also be getting workers compensation money again which will really help me out with my bills and everything in addition to my job’s income. You see how God works? He works everything out, because He already knew this was going to happen and He put things in place to help me and my sons. We have a sympathetic landlord, I was blessed with a job, and I am also being blessed with my workers comp money which will help us. I’m also considering going back to school once my baby is born as well. No matter what happens, we will be ok. My sons father also wants to get back with me, but I don’t really know about that. I found him more tolerable, but I can’t take him back if he is still the same way he was before. I know he really loves me, but he does have his issues. I’ll just have to pray on it. I am not really ready to jump into another relationship so quick, but we can be friends right now and if something happens in the future, then so be it. I know one thing, I will not make the same mistakes as before. I also have another friend whom seems to find interest in me and I don’t want to hurt him because I am not ready to be in another relationship at all. It’s only been a month since Brian has been gone even though the marriage was really over well before then. Although I have no desire to EVER take Brian back I am just not ready for a new relationship. I’m about to have a baby in the next 2 1/2 months, I’m about to get a divorce, and I just need to focus on my new baby and my sons and healing from this terrible marriage. It is nice to have all this attention right now, it kind of makes up for the lack of attention I haven’t been getting in the last 6 months, but still… I can’t.

My sons father did offer to be there for me during my labor and delivery which is very nice of him, and to be honest, I would like him there for the support, but I’m not going to put all my hope into that as of now. I know my Mom WILL be there and I know that I DO NOT want Brian there at all. I don’t need to be stressed from him while in labor or recovery. His mere presence or the mention of his name does nothing, but makes my blood pressure go up. :vangry:

So let me tell you about what happened before I went down there to file:

I had to get an Affidavit of Indigency (Poverty affidavit) notarized, so I went to my bank since it’s free if you have an account. On the affidavit you have to put down your assets so I asked the notary/banker to tell me my account balance. She looked at the joint account which I closed yesterday. Brian has been screwing up my account ever since I added him to it so I did this asap. Anyways, I noticed that he must have opened a new account because there was $6 in the account that he transferred to his account leaving a 0 balance. I really didn’t care about that, but I just wanted to be off the account and since they wouldn’t take me off without him signing for it I was advised to close it. To get to the point of all this, when I asked the banker/notary for the account balance today, she tells me my joint account is negative(I was really asking for the balance of my separate account btw)! How the hell is that? Wanna know why? Because his triphlant butt, after cleaning out the bank account and knowing I was going to close it, swipes the card at his job for $1.62 making the account negative in the total of $-39.12. Now we are both responsible for this balance, and that was the reason why I closed the account in the first place. I don’t want to be in the CHEX system or have my credit messed up thanks to him, he’s already done enough damage as it is. I texted him and of course he didn’t respond, he doesn’t care anyways, I’m sure he did this on purpose. Anyways, I talked to a banker whom was sympathetic to my situation and took the overdraft fee off. She then canceled his card so he couldn’t use it anymore and told me that one of us has to come in and deposit $1.62. Of course his triphlant non-caring behind isn’t going to do it, so I will. I will pay whatever I need to pay to be free of him.

I am so glad I filed for divorce. I will finally be able to move on with my life…

1. I am at peace and without stress when he is gone. I have found that life at home with the just the boys and I is very peaceful. I am not irritated or grossed out or even stressed to say the least. I don’t have to deal with the nasty habits of my husband or by his mere presence when he is doing things that annoy me.

2. My husband justified just about everything he has done wrong. I am tired of this same game of back and forth. Every time I brought up an issue he had a justification for it. He even acted like I was wrong for questioning him about the woman calling the phone that I knew nothing about. This was his reason for walking out. If you have a phone that your wife knows nothing about and then a woman calls it, your wife has the right to ask you about it, but he can’t see my point. Instead he keeps going on about me accusing him, etc. There are so many things have observed during this marriage, that I have found that I cannot tolerate nor live with. Maybe if we had waited for about a year before getting married we would’ve known. Maybe there are things he can’t stand about me either, I don’t know. I’ve asked him several times and he never has an answer. It doesn’t really matter now though, and I am not prepared to try to work this out neither do I desire to. I already know that if I brought up the issues he would become defensive and argumentative and nothing will be solved. This is why it took me a week to ask about the woman calling his phone. I have come to the conclusion that we are just incompatible and it would be best to go our separate ways.

3. I really want to be with someone whom fears and respects God. I need someone with similar values and morals. Someone whom prays and reads the Bible just as much as I do. Who will show me respect and will not exploit my sons to hostile behavior and language. I had my children before this marriage and I am trying to instill certain values and morals within them, but it becomes very difficult when the male whom they look up to as an example is doing the complete opposite. Even though my baby father Jeremy, was a horrible boyfriend I never had these many issues with him when I lived with him. He had some disgusting habits, but it wasn’t this horrible. With that said it’s just best for us to end the marriage for the sake of both of our happiness.

I don’t know if he thinks the conversation we had the other day just repaired everything, but to leave me for asking about a girl calling a cell phone I had no knowledge of is not a good enough reason to walk out on a marriage. That did not sit to well with me and if something that small can make him leave, then I do not want to continue to do this with him. He leaves for the stupidest reasons and justifies it by bringing up the 2 times I left because he cursed me out and another time when after having my income tax seized because of him owing back taxes, having the phone cut off because of him, etc. I then had to listen to his Dad dog me out while he just sat there and played stupid. He didn’t even defend me so I couldn’t take anymore and left and he didn’t even apologize. Instead he justified it, made excuses and to add insult to injury had the nerve to pack his things and leave as well.

It’s just too much. Maybe we can come to a civil agreement regarding the bills and this baby and move on. This is what I hope for anyway.

Disclaimer: So I haven’t talked about my marriage at all for a while, but today I am going to let it all out. Everything, so please bear with me, this is going to be a very intense and rather long post. If you don’t have tough skin, I’d advise you not to read it. Also, if you have a rude comment and you don’t like what you are reading, I’d advise you not to leave a comment at all. It will not appear on this site and you will be blocked. Thank you.

To start off my so-called triphlant, husband walked out on me 2 days ago. As many of you may know, I am 6 months pregnant and I am not working. We stay in a 3 bedroom home paying gas and electric, along with $750 for rent. This nigga claimed he was leaving because I so-calledly keep accusing him of cheating. Mind you I never accused him, but I have asked him about certain things, with good cause.

Let’s start off with his weird a suspicious behavior:

He won’t let me wash his clothes. You heard right. He keeps his clothes in the room leaving a disgusting scent from them piling up in there because he won’t put them in the hamper to let me wash them. I asked him about it and he claimed it was because the hamper was full. IF that was so then it wouldn’t be a large pile of whites on the floor in his room.

He had a cell phone I didn’t know about. There is no excuse he or anyone else can give me to why you didn’t tell your wife whom is pregnant that you have a cell phone. His excuse was that he didn’t think it was important. AND to add insult to injury, he lies and claims his boss at work (whom is a man) bought it for him and put minutes on it. The phone had over 1000 minutes on it might I add. Now I know that is BS, unless your boss is gay and you two got something going on.

He is never at home. On his off days he leaves and stays gone until it gets dark. If he has to work later in the day, he leaves and goes somewhere. Every off day this nigga was up ironing clothes then leaves. On top of that he’ll tell me he’s going one place, but always ends up somewhere else.

Now let’s start with some more issues regarding him:

Nasty Habits. He likes to leave pubic hair all over the bathroom. When I go to shower there’s pubic hair’s all over the shower. On the windowsill and everything…YUCK! He doesn’t wash his hands after using the toilet. Instead he turns the sink on for 2 seconds (literally) and turns it off, to prove that he is so-calledly washing his hands. Doesn’t brush his teeth regularly. His breath always stinks and when he does brush he’s spitting out a mouth full of blood and his toothbrush bristles are always brown. Probably from having Gingivitis or something.

He owes over $7,900 in taxes. He claimed he didn’t know about this, but I believe he did, especially when you owe this much. My tax returns were seized when I stupidly filed joint with him and I had to go through hell and high water to get my money back.

He’s in the CHEX system. I didn’t know this either. I asked him because he had a CHASE access account. I put him on my account to help him out and he’s been over-drafting it ever since. My account is now over $170 overdrawn thanks to him. I asked the branch manager whom used to work for CHASE about the account he had with CHASE and he told me they only give those accounts to people that are in the CHEX system. SMH… What a liar. He told me he never had any bad banking history, he is such a liar! I think he has terrible renting history as well. I’ve never been evicted, but when we tried to get an apartment we either had to pay extra money or couldn’t get approved at all. This has never happened to me when I was on my own.

He has a mental illness I didn’t know about. My mom kept asking me to find out why he is receiving disability checks from Social Security. Come to find out, he’s receiving them because he was diagnosed with a Personality Disorder. This is why the navy discharged him. I went online and read the profiles and he fits perfectly in the Borderline Personality and Schizoid Personality Disorder. So fucking selfish! It would’ve been real nice for him to tell me this before we got married so I could have had a choice to get married and pregnant by a mentally retardant person.

There’s a lot of other things that happened in the last months such as him cursing me out when I asked him why he wouldn’t eat my food, or telling him about how his snoring kept me up. When he walked out on me it was because I asked him about a woman calling the cell phone I knew nothing about. Instead of answering the question, he curses at me all in front of my kids as usual and storms all over the house. I one day had to walk up the hill, about a mile to my moms at 1am, 5 months pregnant with my 4 year old and 2 year old because when I asked him why he wouldn’t eat my food he told me to “shut the fuck up!”. He has no respect for me and it seems like anything will set him off.

He even missed the babies first doctor appointment and ultrasound. Every time we planned on going to an appointment concerning the baby he did something so he wouldn’t have to go. When I suggested childbirth classes, he showed no interest in doing that either. I really wish I hadn’t got pregnant by him. Why me? Why did I have to marry and get pregnant by the mentally unstable, cold-hearted, selfish bastard?!

On top of that my aunt bought a bed over for us because she saw that I was sleeping on the floor on a mattress. I had Brian put the bed up, and for about a week I was still sleeping on the floor while he slept in the bed my aunt bought. How triphlant is that? It actually took me to say something to him for me to sleep in the bed. The following day he walks out on me and the kids because he was up again on an off day ironing clothes as usual and someone called the house PRIVATE. He then got on the phone talking low and walking into the other room. When I asked him who it was he claimed it was something he filled out on the internet. I replied “Really?” he said yea and I left it alone. I don’t have time to be trying to figure shit out because if you’re doing something foul it will come out eventually. I went into the room to get Jeremiah and fix breakfast, Brian then starts yelling asking me what I meant by “Really?” I told him nothing, but he wouldn’t leave the situation alone so I asked him about the female calling the phone that I knew nothing about and then he starts yelling and cursing saying I’m accusing him. I told him I wasn’t accusing him and if he felt like everything he is doing is right then don’t worry about it. He says “I;m not doing everything right, but I’m not cheating!” I told him to just leave it alone. He wouldn’t and kept cursing in front of the kids packing his things and leaves. He came back the next day stole my computer and left again. Two days later he comes and takes all his clothes, birth certificate, and other papers and leaves claiming he’s not running away from the baby, he’s running away from me.

Now does this make any sense to you? Either he is mentally unstable, cheating, or on drugs because that is not a good enough reason to abandon your wife whom is pregnant. I guess you can say this is a blessing in diguise. I couldn’t stand him no way. I find him repulsive anyways, because he is so nasty and he looks so gross and out of shape nude. I didn’t even want to have sex with him because of how gross he looks to me. At first I could overlook his nasty body, but when you are cursing and being straight foul, those things just start to stick me in my side and I can’t ignore it.

I’m glad he’s gone, but now I have to figure out how I’m going to pay rent, and utilities. I know that the judge will make him pay the bills because he was in fact the breadwinner and he is obligated to pay. This is just such a shame. I thought my kids father was the worse man ever, but Brian fucking Crayton has topped the list big time in being the nastiest, most selfish, triphlant man I’ve ever met in my life.